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Make me laugh for a few invites

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  • #61
    I am not saying anything, but thats a hospital :o
    RIP WHAT

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    • #62
      hi, acela, could I have invite to learnbits? Thanks.

      I'll tell a little bit physical joke :)

      Once upon time one man worked as a train conductor. One day pretty blonde
      had been sitting in a coach. He asked her:
      - Your ticket, please!
      - Oh! It had flown away through the window...
      The conductor threw the blonde out of train. The conductor was sentenced
      to electric chair. Execution:
      - You can tell us your last wish.
      - Give me one banana, please!
      After he had finished to eat the knife-switch was turned on - NOTHING.
      The knife-switch was turned on for the second time - NOTHING! By the laws
      he must be pardoned. He has got his freedom and once again he started to
      work as a train conductor. One day a boy had been sitting in a coach. The
      conductor asked him:
      - Your ticket, please!
      - Oh! I'd eaten it...
      THe rest of the story was the same. Execution:
      - You can tell us your last wish.
      - Give me one banana, please!
      After he had finished to eat he was checked thoroughly. Perhaps he used it
      in an unforeseen way? No. Knife-switch was turned on - NOTHING!
      The knife-switch was turned on for the second time - NOTHING!
      By the laws he must be pardoned.
      Before he got freedom the conductor was asked:
      - Why do you eat banana every time before execution? What is the point?
      - I don't know... I like to eat banana... Concerning my survival...
      Perhaps I'm VERY VERY BAD CONDUCTOR...!

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      • #63
        learnbits invite sent to akkur and freshon.tv invite code sent to RedBeard.

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        • #64
          A funny Joke:

          A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One's for me and one's for this little guy here," and he pulls a 3 inch man out of his pocket. The bartender asks "He can drink?"
          "Oh, sure. He can drink."
          So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up.
          "That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?"
          The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man.
          The bartender is in total shock. "That's amazing" he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?"
          The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa hunting and you called that witch doctor a ******!"

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          • #65
            Ok, I just like laughing so Im gonna tell you a story.

            A couple of years ago, I think it was in summer, I was at a bar by myself because my friend got drunk and started a fight with a cigarette machine and lost, so anyway I meet this girl and were talking and flirting for a couple of hours and everything is going really well, and then the bartender yells "last call" so she looks at me and says "hey would you like to come back to my place with me" and Im like "yeah sure" but inside Im screaming and almost about to lose my sh*t because this girl was ridiculous hot. So then she says to me "listen I have to warn you Im REALLY freaky, I mean it." and Im like "Yeah? Well I'm pretty freaky too so this should be fun" and she's like "I mean it I AM FREAKY". So we go back to her place and she gets me a drink and tells me shes gonna get ready, so she goes into the bathroom and all I can hear is the sounds of zippers and clanking metal and machinery for like almost an hour, finally she comes out and she is decked out head to toe in leather and zippers and fishnets and high heels, and when she comes out she cracks a whip, it was crazy. But just as she is coming out of the bathroom, Im walking out the door.
            So she yells "Hey where ya going I thought we were gonna get FREAKY?"
            So I say "Listen lady I already f*cked your Cat and Came in your fishtank how much FREAKIER do you want me to get?"

            I love that joke.


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            • #66
              My attempt at making you laugh; a joke. I'm after freshon.tv :)

              René Descartes walks into a pub.
              "May I help you?" asks the bartender.
              "I think not," says Descartes and vanishes.



              In case you don't get it, here's a hint: "I think, therefore I am"
              Last edited by woosh; March 18, 2010, 03:49 PM.

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              • #67
                very nice woosh; you get one freshon invite
                skullphones and d6p4u - and all the rest who will post here - please mention if you want an invite or just make me laugh
                thanks

                oh ...and no more freshon.tv invites for now; i get some next month
                Last edited by acela; March 19, 2010, 11:06 AM.

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                • #68
                  Originally posted by acela View Post
                  very nice woosh; you get one freshon invite
                  skullphones and d6p4u - and all the rest who will post here - please mention if you want an invite or just make me laugh
                  thanks

                  oh ...and no more freshon.tv invites for now; i get some next month
                  Thanks :)
                  Glad you liked it, it's one of my favourite jokes :P

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                  • #69
                    I just wanted to make you, and anyone else who reads it laugh, if you really want to just give someone a random invite, if not just smile and be happy :)


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                    • #70
                      Acela, will you please update your initial post in relation to how many invites you have remaining? Thank you.
                      ♥ Jen

                      BEST INTRO EVER: http://www.torrent-invites.com/accep...we-people.html

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                      • #71
                        Not looking for invites,
                        this one cracked me up:
                        Wayne rooney and christiano ronaldo-
                        The had some heated moments between them during a world cup match.

                        But.... They became good friends during their manU days, and the moments got hotter than before :D
                        RIP WHAT

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                        • #72
                          freshon tv invites are back and added 2 bitspyder invites.
                          First post updated.
                          Thanks

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                          • #73
                            ok then ... invites still available - see first post
                            so i m gonna bring this up
                            if nobody wants them in the next week i m gonna close this thread and make some GA's with these invites
                            thank you all for postin' here

                            Comment


                            • #74
                              Originally posted by Purple Cobra View Post
                              We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
                              that's how its always been, they arrive when you don't need them.

                              Comment


                              • #75
                                We Didn't Start the Flame War - CollegeHumor video

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